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Talk to Your Kids about Failure – and Share Stories from Your Life

Posted by dataperk on July 27, 2020

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    This time last year, a respected grandmother in my This time last year, a respected grandmother in my community told me about a non-profit she loves to support: Grace House Ministries @gracehouse After touring the facility and meeting with Pamela Phipps, the executive director, I was sold. At Grace House, girls in foster care are given stable Christian homes that create transformational change and help them break generational cycles of poverty and abuse. They discover new life through Christ. New on the Girl Mom podcast, Pamela and I talk about “Raising Girls Who Know Jesus Christ.” The lessons at Grace House are the lessons we need in our homes too, and I love the intentionality that the Grace House team pours into every single girl. Comment GRACE and I’ll message you the link. And to make a year-end donation or support Grace House in other ways (including Christmas stocking stuffers), check out the show notes links🎄
    I never planned to have 4 children. In fact, I alw I never planned to have 4 children. In fact, I always felt like 3 was the max that I could handle. When I got pregnant with 4th child Camille, I’d just come out of my hardest season of parenting (harder than parenting 4 teenage girls!!!) I was just starting to feel like myself after 6 years of pregnancies and breastfeeding. Already, we were crammed into a tiny house and money was tight after the financial crash significantly reduced our income. When I looked at the future, I felt stressed and overwhelmed. I couldn’t imagine the countless blessings this new child would bring. It was a hard pregnancy, and though I trusted God, I couldn’t understand why He’d give me a 4th child without the desire to add one more. Looking back now, I think I was depressed. I was disillusioned about my life. Only when I met Camille on her birthday did my heart thaw. Only then did I realize that I WAS ready to embrace this beautiful girl just like I did her sisters. And when I think about life without her - and the joy our family would have missed - I want to cry. I want to get down on my knees and thank God forever for the best Christmas gift that I didn’t have the foresight to pray for. Today when I look at Camille, I’m reminded of God’s goodness. I have tangible proof that His plan is best. Pastor Rick Warren once said, “There are accidental parents but there are no accidental babies,” and it’s true. Each year at this time, as we prepare to celebrate Camille’s birthday, I remember her pregnancy and blink back tears of gratitude that God chose me to be her mom. She’s the 4th child I didn’t think we needed….and the biggest blessing to prove me wrong. New on my Substack, temporarily free, is my very honest account of struggling with a pregnancy and trusting God through it. Comment GIFT and I’ll send you the link to our Christmas baby’s story 🎁
    Learning to parent with “relationship & rules” is Learning to parent with “relationship & rules” is key in the teenage years. Here are thoughts on what that looks like from #loveherwellbook 🤍
    It’s a big day at the Girl Mom Podcast, for 2 reas It’s a big day at the Girl Mom Podcast, for 2 reasons. First of all, we are celebrating 1 million downloads 🎉 🎉 I never expected to hit this milestone since podcasting is priority #4 in my work schedule, but I guess it shows how episodes add up. I’m grateful for every faithful listener and every meaningful conversation I’ve had. It’s been a fun ride! And second (and more importantly!), we’re ringing in episode #100 with this dynamic trio!! They’re known across the world, yet they live in my community, and we are SO blessed to have them as Mountain Brook treasures! Lulu Gribbin @lulu.gribbin was just 15 years old when she was attacked by a bull shark in Florida in June 2024, losing her left hand and her right leg. She was with her twin sister Ellie and their mom, Ann Blair, on a mother/daughter trip. Since that fateful day, Lulu has defied all odds. She is now thriving as a joyful, athletic, funny, wise, kind, optimistic, humble, and vivacious teenage girl, and as she embraces her new life with 2 prosthetics, she gives hopes to millions that they too can overcome their darkest days and feel excited about what is next. Already, Lulu has spoken to crowds up to 19,000 people, been named the @southernlivingmag 2025 Southerner of the Year, and been featured on @goodmorningamerica. The sky is the limit for this girl, and I tell my daughter Camille all the time how lucky she is to be just a year behind Lulu and Ellie in school and witness firsthand the start of greatness. Whatever God has in store for the Gribbin family, it’ll be big! Having this conversation about Lulu’s survivor story was an honor, and if you comment LULU, I’ll message you the link. Also, as you make year-end donations, please consider giving to the new Lulu Strong Foundation, linked in the show notes and found here: @lulu.gribbin Lulu’s mission is to help fellow amputees through research that speeds up their recovery time and helps them master prosthetics through virtual reality and AI. It’s a FASCINATING topic, and I hope you’ll join me in supporting Lulu’s Foundation as she shines a spotlight amputee needs and allows us to help her significantly impact lives!
    Parents often reach out to me as they struggle wit Parents often reach out to me as they struggle with poor choices their teenager, college student, or young adult has made. Especially as kids leave home (and become legal adults) we lose control. We start to parent with more influence than control. New on my Substack, for paid subscribers, are tips on how to respond wisely. Comment LOVE and I’ll message you the link - or find the link in my bio. This message is from my new release #isyourdaughterreadybook. Also, some food for thought: Since I’m at the age where everyone is losing parents, one thing I repeatedly hear is that after a parent’s death, a core memory that often plays on repeat in the child’s mind is how that parent handled their most disappointing choices. Did their parents love them even when they were hard to love? If so, that is never ever forgotten. We can hold our kids to high standards, let them face consequences, and still leave zero doubt that we’ll be there if they fall. Every human is just 1 step away from falling off a cliff, and keeping this in mind makes a big difference in whether we act on knee-jerk reactions or pray for wisdom first 🕊️
    When it comes to college, I tell my girls that you When it comes to college, I tell my girls that you want to be where God wants you to be. I remind them that I’ve been to college, and I got to make my choices, and now it’s their turn to make their choices, which may be different than mine, beginning with what school they choose. I tell them to pay attention to how a campus makes you feel and what feels most like “home.” You can get a great education in many places, yet it’s the intangibles and gut instincts that ultimately help you make the right call. In all my years of reading articles on college selection, I’ve never seen any mention of prayer, discernment, consulting God, or trusting your gut. But the way I see it, only He knows the future. Only He knows the people we should meet and the experiences we should have that play into His long-term plan. I met many of my best friends in college as well as my husband, who grew up next door to my pledge sister. Even my instinct to choose that sorority had a major impact on my life trajectory. When my first book released, many moms who led small group studies or planned speaking events were people I knew from college. They weren’t my best friends, but rather, friendly acquaintances. I had no idea at age 18, as I made random connections, that God would later weave them back into my life in more significant ways. I share this with my daughters too to remind them that the biggest blessings they’ll carry away from college are the relationships that they cultivate. I know outstanding kids who attend high-brow universities, and I cheer so hard for them. At the same time, every campus has success stories. Every campus has students who thrive and become amazing alums. More important than choosing the most prestigious college you get into is choosing a college that brings you peace. If we want our kids to be happy, it’s wise to help them find the place that gets them excited, feels like home, and sets the stage for their future. As our kids make decisions about their life and their calling, let’s remind them to consult their intuition. Sometimes God has a quiet way of revealing where to go. *This is us in 2000, graduating from Bama’s EMBA Program.
    SEC Championship with my game day date for 30 year SEC Championship with my game day date for 30 years and counting❤️ Not the outcome (or game) we hoped for, but through all the ups and downs we love cheering on Bama with so many lifelong friends. Roll Tide always!
    Shopping for a teen girl/college girl this Christm Shopping for a teen girl/college girl this Christmas? My devotional makes a perfect stocking stuffer and has been a bestseller since it released last January. Comment DEVO and I’ll message you the link🩷 This book also works well for tween girls. Girls like to read “up” and hear about scenarios that prepare them for what’s to come, and the stories in this devo do that. Mom friends tell me that they relate to messages as well, so it’s really for all ages. Thank you for your support of a book that I wrote for my own daughters, it’s been so rewarding to share with you!
    A reader shared this with me years ago, and I resh A reader shared this with me years ago, and I reshare these beautiful words from @katiemblackburn every December. Remember: Perfect parents don’t prepare their kids for an imperfect world. Perfect parents don’t let their children see their desperate need for a Savior. No holiday season is perfect, but the One we worship is, and the fact that He came to rescue us is the joy that defines this season⭐️
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